Time is moving.

On Sunday, Blaze will be home for three weeks. As we all know, time moves so fast...so fast that one day I will be writing that Blaze has been home for a year. I can't wait to see what I will be writing then! 

During Good Dogs! Team Training we talked about the child and dog bonding. They shared stories on how some kids bonded right away and some take months to form the bond. They encourage that the bond organically be formed, which I wholeheartedly agree with.

Wyatt has a trend of taking a long time to warm up to new people and things. My goal is to have Blaze be part of Wyatt's world. Blaze isn't going to therapy or school yet with Wyatt; however, we have been making visits. When Wyatt sees Blaze walk through the door he smiles from ear to ear, runs over to Blaze, and jumps up and down. When Blaze is with Wyatt in public settings, including therapy he is constantly touching Blaze. It's crazy how Blaze brings a sense of calm with Wyatt. Yes, this is my child sitting to do a puzzle!! This doesn't happen....

This past weekend I took Wyatt and Blaze to Gap to buy Wyatt uniform shorts for school. As we are checking out, Blaze was in the down position.I turned around to be sure Wyatt wasn't unfolding the clothes on the rack behind us, when I discovered him sitting on the ground beside Blaze. What?! Wyatt's OT said it best, it's like Blaze helps Wyatt determine his space. Usually when checking out at a store, I pretty much am holding Wyatt down, fumbling for my wallet, and feeling super overwhelmed. Thank you, Blaze!!! 

Blaze was born on Christmas Day 2014. He was born the Christmas that I took the trip to California to visit my sister and had that horrible lady make a comment about not wanting to sit by my family on the plane. The trip that made me decide that yes I wanted to add a service dog to our family. I love that his birthday is on Christmas Day, because he is for sure the best present ever! Already in three weeks, I see Wyatt more independent and confident in public outings, more calm during stressful moments like checking out at the store. In these three weeks, I have had more people stop and speak to Wyatt...this never happened before. It awesome because it gives Wyatt the opportunity to practice his social skills. 

Blaze is a loving, sweet, silly boy. He started sleeping with Wyatt, this week. Wyatt climbs all over him and he just lays there loving the touch. Blaze is always ready to go. We run or walk every evening for at least 2 miles. When we walk in the door, he runs and finds his ball and looks at me like lets play. His face is the sweetest ever, he has a forever puppy face. To say I'm obsessed with him, might be an understatement. 

I can't wait to share more...I can't wait to tell more stories...I can't wait to see what three more months or one more year look like. I'm forever grateful to have this opportunity for Wyatt. I'm amazed at how awesome Wyatt's therapist have worked with us on getting Blaze integrated into Wyatt's routine. We have an awesome team. 

Tell next time... 

 

Our first week...

How is Wyatt doing with Blaze??? I get this question a lot this past week. 

Wyatt knows Blaze is his dog! He smiles at Blaze when he passes him in the house, when he is greeting him at school, etc. He makes great eye contact with Blaze and giggles at Blaze's actions (Blaze can be a pretty funny dog). I have been introducing Blaze to Wyatt's every day world (and getting Wyatt use to Blaze in his every day world), bringing him to therapy here and there, putting them in Wyatt's room together, having Blaze in bathroom during bath time, playing outside together, etc. I've brought Blaze to Wyatt's social group a couple of times last week. Wyatt turns around at least every 5 minutes to be sure Blaze is still laying behind him.

I am thankful that Wyatt already seems excited about Blaze. I look forward to their bond growing stronger. We have tethered Wyatt to Blaze while going to and from therapy, at target and grocery, etc. Wyatt seems very comfortable with the tethering. In his six years of life, this is the first time he has walked through stores without holding mom and/or dad's hand. Such an independence opportunity for Wyatt. 

Many people ask, when will they bond. Depends on the child and dog. It could take a few months up to several months. Wyatt is a kiddo that takes awhile to warm up to new things. One year for Christmas he got a swing set for outside, it took him two weeks to play on it. 

Some things I have learned the first week:

• Having a service dog draws more attention to your family. Everyone looks, some people smile and some people gawk as if they never have seen a service dog.
• It's only been a week, but I feel like people are a little more patient with us. 
• Every morning when we take River to summer camp, the guy working the front desk makes a point to say hi and bye to Wyatt (and waits for Wyatt to respond). One day after dropping River off, Wyatt and I were leaving and a few ladies were oohing and aahing over Blaze. The front desk guy said, "forget the dog, I think that kid is pretty awesome". 
• Wyatt had a tantrum after leaving River at summer camp (don't think he was sad to leave his brother, more that it was unfair brother was at place with a swimming pool). People waited kindly for me to get him together and out the door.  Also Blaze did amazing. It's like he knows, he stood patiently looking at me with his sweet eyes like "you got this mom".
• A lady at the grocery story, in line in front of us, offered me her $10 dollar off coupon...kind gesture.
• Everyone is excited to tell you about their pet dogs and cats when they see you with a service dog. I am pretty sure every target and grocery trip we took (four total last week - crazy, right), someone had a story to tell me.
• Wyatt is enjoying the independence being tethered while shopping. I took both boys and Blaze to grocery Saturday morning to grab a few things. While we were checking out I was giving Blaze command to come "here" and lay "down". Once he was settled, I looked up to see Wyatt has grabbed and opened bubble gum. Rookie mistake on my part. 
• It's an opportunity to spread autism awareness. When people ask about Blaze, I have the opportunity to tell them the things Blaze does and will do for Wyatt. 
• Integrity of my pack is more important than opinion of others! I've been running 2 miles with Blaze in the evenings. He, much like me, loves to socialize. When he sees another dog he gets a bit excited, I give him the "leave it" command so we can continue our run, not distracted. A few times I have had to give a firm "No". I've gotten some looks, which is hard for me to not stop and say, "he is my son's service dog. Once he gets away with jumping around for another dog, I won't be able to break it later on when he is working with my son. I know I sound firm but that's how I get him to know I mean business." Instead I remind myself that integrity of my pack is more important than opinion of others.
• Our bond (Blaze and mine) is getting stronger. I practice commands with him daily and surprised how much better I am getting. He is 100% trained, he knows the commands, it's me getting the tone, body language correct. Here is he practicing the "lay on" command. This command would provide deep pressure for Wyatt. Unfortunately we didn't have any humans around while practicing, but Monkey Joe did great.Also I got him to do it the first time! At Team Training it took me at least 400 times. 
  

We will continue to bring Blaze more and more into Wyatt's world. One day he will attend therapy and school with Wyatt (without me). I know that day will be awesome for both of them! 

Blaze is home!!!!

Not sure where to start or how to even explain Team Training with Good Dog! last week. I'm pretty sure I experienced every single emotion possible  - excitement, nervous, terrified, anxious, sad, happy, overwhelmed, grateful, ecstatic, and accomplished. I wanted this so badly for Wyatt, I've waited a year and a half for this week; however, I also felt this huge sense of responsibility, I had to succeed....but boy I had no idea how hard it was to succeed!

Four dogs had been placed with families, one of them was us! We all sat in a room from 8:30-5:00 Monday - Friday, learning about commands, forming bonds with our dogs, and becoming benevolent leaders.  We each were umbilical corded with our dogs (tethered) for the five days, the first three days after training we were not to speak to one another till we met back at training. Three of the four of us stayed in the same house, passing by one another with only a smile (oh yes and keeping our dogs from playing with each other).

We had the opportunity to practice our skills by going out to lunch on Wednesday and to the mall and lunch on Thursday. I learned fast on Wednesday not to offer the trainers a taste of my appetizer, as he took a bite of a fried pickle and then threw the rest on the floor right in front of Blaze (rookie mistake). Of course, Blaze passed with flying colors. While at the mall, we shopped, practiced the elevator and escalator. Blaze and I practiced walking slowly, not pulling on the leash, and that we didn't have to always be with the "pack" (hard for both of us). Blaze and I did a little underwear shopping as we practiced not being obtrusive in public.

A few of my favorite things/lesson learned about team training:

1) When I was able to give a command correctly and Blaze responded was the most amazing feeling ever!!  Prior to team training, I thought you just gave a dog a command. I didn't realize it took the correct tone and body language, and most importantly confidence. I never knew how high pitched my voice was till I was trying to get Blaze to go under a table and he kept jumping up on the table. Thank you Blaze for teaching me that lesson (he is much smarter than me).

2) Learning all things dog! We learned so much about our dogs, their personalities, why they matched with us, grooming them properly, and understanding the stress our "working dogs" might experience. I will always remember that no matter what happens it's the handler and never the dog, the dog law "if it worked; I'll do it again. If it didn't, I won't", and the integrity of my pack is more important than opinions of others.

3) The three other families! When your child gets a diagnosis of Autism, you automatically join this "club". A club of parents and therapists who fight for their children day and night, who hope that one day their child may talk or one day their child will have a friend (and many, many other things). As we would say in the south, these three other handlers were good people!  We all watched each other push past our comfort zones, watch each other fail, and succeed. We cheered and encouraged each other when needed. Oh, also they listened to me complain about not being able to socialize in the evenings - boy was that hard for me.

4) The Good Dog! organization is the  most amazing, caring, loving non-profit organizations ever!!!  I have never seen someone else care so much about their "clients". The trainers were patient, generous with encouragement, and confident with constructive criticism.  They care so much about the dogs only using positive training methods and encouraging us to remember our dogs are "thinking dogs"! They were able to provide such valuable information!  I can't imagine ever working with another organization.

Please know, they are a nonprofit and always accepting donations, if you have an extra $20, $100, $1000, or $100,000. I promise you your money will be well spent. Donations can be made on their website - http://gooddogautismcompanions.org/.

5) Blaze!! Oh my goodness, he is the most amazing dog ever. He is always ready to go, first dog ready to do the command (of course, only if I didn't confuse the poor guy), he is the biggest snuggle bug ever, and his eyes will make one's heart melt. He is full of energy and love.  I can't wait to see he and Wyatt bond.


On Saturday, Blaze graduated from a dog "in training" to a "service dog" and he has became a part of our family! Graduation was such an awesome experience! I am so grateful to be part of the Good Dog! family!

I am so thankful that I had my sister and brother-in-law (and three of their four children) sitting behind me at graduation. Our families have stood behind us with every step of Wyatt's diagnosis and journey. We are so lucky to have such amazing support.

This week taught me so much and I have so much hope for Wyatt and Blaze!! I can't thank the Good Dog! organization enough. I promise to share more about Blaze and Wyatt's adventures. Already I can say, we went to Target (Wyatt, Blaze, River, and me) and had a successful trip with no whining. We had a social bridging opportunity when we took River to camp and 15 kids swarmed Blaze and Wyatt was right in the middle of the action. We have seen Wyatt and Blaze make eye contact a few times (eye contact is so hard for Wyatt). I feel good things will happen! Thank you Good Dog!!!

It's Time!!

I am sitting in the airport, waiting to depart New Orleans, praying the weather and airline cooperate so I can arrive in San Diego this evening. As I'm watching the rain fall (of course it storms an hour before my flight...please no delays, please no delays), I think about this journey. I dreamed of this week training in San Diego, dreamed of Wyatt having a service dog, and it's all here!

I'm so grateful for all of those who donated, shared our stories with others, and listen to me talk about this opportunity a million times! The next five days, I will participate in training from 8am- 5:30pm (quizzes included, please pray I pass). On Saturday, Blaze will graduate from a service dog "in training" to a service dog.  I'm so thankful that my sister and her family will join me at graduation, as I know this will be such a memorable day in my life!

I keep reminding myself to be present, feel, and acknowledge the emotions as they present themselves. Monday through Wednesday evening we are instructed, that after training, we are not to have human contact, as an opportunity to bond with our dogs. I am so looking forward to this time with Blaze, also reminds me of how fortunate I am that Blaze's trainer, Sam, has been so open to meeting us prior to this training. I feel like I have a head start in the bonding process! Hopefully, Blaze is as excited to see me, as I am to see him!

Today I feel beyond excited, so ready for this opportunity for our family! I feel sad, as it is hard to say goodbye to Eddie and the boys for a week ( River told me at least 40000 times how much he will miss me and why can't daddy go). I'm nervous, when you want something so bad for your child, I hope that I do well! And again, I feel grateful for this opportunity, grateful for all those who have helped make this happen!

I will try to provide a quick update daily for those who would like to follow my journey this week!

Blaze McIntyre

It's been awhile since I have shared our adventures!!

I'm excited to share that we have officially named Wyatt's service dog, Blaze!! I am pretty sure naming the dog was equivalent to naming one of my children. I wanted a name that seemed fitting of the dog, went well with Wyatt's name, and something that was still cool when Wyatt was 15! I thought that Wyatt, River (Wyatt's brother), and Blaze all went well together. Wyatt's amazing therapist did a speech drill with him to see if he could/would say the name Blaze and he did!

Something else super exciting happened too...we got to have Blaze for a weekend!! His trainer came to New Orleans for jazz fest, which meant we had time to get to know Blaze. We had a few rules - no treats, no walks, just lots of love and attention. We feel so fortunate that we got this time with Blaze, as this is something that doesn't typically happen during the process.

Needless to say, we fell in love with him! He might be the sweetest, most loving dog I have ever met. He loves to snuggle and give kisses.He has a ton of energy, which if anyone knows Wyatt knows that is necessary. He loves to play and has such a fun, silly side to him. One night Wyatt was getting a bath. Blaze  was in the bathroom with us. He had his head hanging over the tub watching Wyatt. Then it was like a light bulb went off, he went got his ball and dropped it in the tub for Wyatt... like play with me. Of course, Wyatt picks up the ball and puts it right in his own mouth. Blaze stood waiting like come on, throw it to me now, throw it, throw it! Was so awesome to watch them engage with each other.

There isn't a day that goes by that I think if we had Blaze would this situation been easier or different?  We took the boys to the aquarium this past weekend. Wyatt LOVES the aquarium!! He stands as close to the glass as he can get, he flaps his little hands with delight, and squeals as loud as he can. As his mom, I love watching the pure delight in his face.  In Wyatt's excitement he ran up to a lady and with both hands and played the drums on her booty (individuals with autism often do not understand personal boundaries)! I looked at the lady and said "oh goodness, I'm so sorry" with a smile on my face, as I am holding Wyatt's hand. The lady glares at me...not for one second, not for two seconds, but several seconds. My blood starts to boil, I glare back and say "try to have a little patience, he has special needs, his just excited". Of course it isn't appropriate for him to play drums on anyone's booty, I acknowledge that. However he is 1) a six-year-old kid 2) he often doesn't understand what is appropriate and unappropriated. For the next 30 minutes I was so frustrated, telling myself to shake it off. Then of course I think, if Blaze was with us, she would understand by sight Wyatt has needs. Would that help?

Tomorrow we get to meet Blaze and his trainer to practice tethering. We are so excited!! Stay tuned for more...

Jake!

On Monday, April 18 2016 I received a call from Laura at Good Dog! Autism Companions informing us that we have matched!!! After a year and two months wait, we now have a service dog for Wyatt!! His trainer calls him Jake, we will soon decide his forever name.

Good Dog! Autism Companions is based in Fallbrook, CA. In July, as Jake's main handler, I will travel to California for a five day boot camp training. During this training, I will bond with Jake and learn everything that I will need to know to be a service dog handler. After the five days of training, Jake will graduate from a dog in training, to a service dog. Then I get to bring Jake home to Wyatt and he will forever be part of our family!

We happened to be in Disney World when we received the matching news! We awoke early on Tuesday morning to go enjoy our last day of Magic Kingdom fun.  I happened to glance at my emails, while waiting for the boys to wake up. I had an email from Laura informing me that Sam, Jake's trainer, lived only 3 hours away from us. Of course, I immediately responded wanting to know more details. After a few email exchanges with Sam, we scheduled a time on Wednesday for us to meet Jake!

I am pretty sure I didn't sleep much Tuesday night (except long enough to have a dream that Jake had a huge hole in his side..you think I was nervous?!). I was so excited about meeting Jake. So amazed that we got this opportunity, as most families don't get to meet their dogs till boot camp training.For the last year, I had played the moment I would meet Wyatt's service dog in my head at least a million times and now it is happening!!

Needless to say, Jake was awesome (and so is Sam). He is super sweet, loving, with a silly side to him (perfect for us).We got lots of kisses. Wyatt didn't acknowledge Jake much, which was not a surprise. We were in a new environment, with a new person, and a new dog. It usually takes Wyatt awhile to warm up to anything that is new.  And by awhile, I mean weeks if not months.

I had no problem loving on Jake. However I do have to admit, that I totally felt intimidated not knowing commands. It was really awesome to watch Sam give Jake commands! You can see the respect and love Jake has for Sam. I am so excited to be that person for Jake and help create a wonderful bond between him and Wyatt. I have huge faith that Sam will help me get there.

Stay tuned for more details and hopefully Jake's forever name. Laura and Sam informed us that changing Jake's name is not confusing to him. A dog doesn't recognize him/herself by their name, simply their name is more of a command. If the child can rename the dog a name he/she picks out it is an opportunity for child/dog to bond. Wyatt is nonverbal (lacks functional language) so unfortunately he is not offering up any names. However we are working on a few names with him to see if he can say them and his reaction to the name. His therapist are also working with him on names they are rallying for. We have an awesome team!!

Thanks for joining this journey with us! We are beyond the moon excited. Welcome to our family, Jake.

Got to have a little patience...

I've never been known for my patience. It really isn't a strength of mine. As I get older, I think I am getting better at it, however its still not my strong suit. With that said, I am so excited to find out whether we will "match" with Wyatt's dog this month!! I check my phone at least 400 times a day, to be sure I didn't miss an email or phone call.

We started the service dog journey in January 2015. After my husband and I were on the same page, I started to look for which organization would be the best fit. There are different kinds of organizations when it comes to service dogs. There are some that are for profit, some that are non-profit, some that train all kinds of service dogs and some that specialize in autism service dogs.  Oh my goodness, how do I make this kind of decision?

Ironically, I mentioned that I was researching autism service dogs to a work friend. Who said, you know Susie Cupcake (changing persons name) volunteers with a company that trains service dogs. What? Really?  I work in medical publishing and get the benefit of working with nurse educators. Susie Cupcake is a nurse educator who had developed a product we sell. I had the opportunity to meet her at a couple of times; however had no idea she worked with service dogs.It truly amazes me how people have been in my life at the perfect time!

Needless to say, I emailed her immediately with a page full of questions. She immediately responded, one of the first things she said, " I must tell you that I am not certain how objective I can be in this discussion because this work is the most rewarding service that I have ever done. I am so touched by the manner in which a dog changes the life of persons and families. it is absolutely remarkable - each and every time - no matter how many stories I hear watch, read about or witness."

She worked with an organization who trained dogs to become autism service dogs. The organization she worked with was in a different state and only serves families in a 50-70 mile radius. Therefore, she gave me some great advice on what to look for when researching different organizations.

During my research, with her criteria in mind, I came across a non-profit organization called Good Dog! Autism Companions. I read every single line of their website, then schedule my "free chat" with the Executive Director and Founder of the company. This call took place in January 2015.  After our call, I knew this was the organization I wanted to work with, so I officially applied. Some of my favorite things about Good Dog! Autism Companions:

1) Laura, the Executive Director and Founder, is a mom to a son with autism. She gets it!!
2) They only use positive re-enforcement training methods for their dogs, as taught by Bonnie Bergin at Bergin University of Canine Studies.
3) I loved that they worked with a Canine University.
4) The follow ADI (Assistance Dog International) training, team and support standards.
5) They are a non-profit.
6) Their dogs are golden retrievers and labs. We love both of those breeds.
7) They provided very in-depth training for dog handler (me).

We were accepted into Good Dogs! Autism Companions program. The cost to train each dog is $26,000. We were tasked to raise $13,000 (half the cost), once we hit the $7000 mark we would be put on the waiting list for a dog. I couldn't believe this was happening!!

I've never been part of a fundraising effort, let alone lead the effort. Good Dog! Autism Companions has a fundraising page for the families in the program. I immediately created Wyatt's customized page. If individuals wanted to donate, they could go online to Wyatt's page and make the donation. Each time we got a donation, I would receive an email.  I started making a list of ideas. I should post on my facebook page so my friends and family knew we were fundraising. I thought about organizing a 5K and 10K (I'm a runner) with our local sports store. Thought maybe I could work with some local restaurants to host a night for Wyatt and give us a percentage of sales. The list started to grow.

On February 7, 2015 at 8:34 am I posted a message on Facebook sharing our fundraising efforts and a link to Wyatt's Good Dog! Autism Companions page.  My inbox started to explode. My facebook friends started sharing my post, their friends and family started sharing on their facebook page, and donations were starting to come in. By, Feb 9, 2015 at 6:03 am we had raised $8594 and were officially on the waiting list! I was overwhelmed with people's generosity. I knew that eventually the donations would slow down and I would need to start with my other efforts. Five days later, on Feb 12th we had hit our goal! Ladies and gentlemen, we raised $13,000 in five days via social media! We set a Good Dog! Autism record. Our final donations ended at $14,194.89! AMAZING!!!!

Needless to say we were completely overwhelmed by everyone's generosity. I was amazed by the number of people who donated - friends from my autism circle, friends from my childhood, friends I've made over my adult years, family, my family's friends, my work colleagues, my work colleagues parents, my husband's work colleagues, my husband's friends, my niece's girl scout troop,  a local Roden & Fields team, our realtor, our realtor's daughter, therapist that had worked with Wyatt, the list goes on.

Many times during our autism journey, I have felt very scared. I worry that people will accept my son. I worry that people will accept me as I fight for his needs. I worry that I am providing enough therapies, resources, and tools for Wyatt. I have amazing support system, friends and family who have went through this journey with me. I however had no idea how many other people supported and loved us! My husband and I were astonished at the number of people who donated for the good of our child and family.

Over the course of the year, I have tried to restrain myself from emailing Laura to ask her how much longer she thought. We were told in our first call to expect the process to take 18 months to 2 years. I knew that we would not get a dog immediately (which again Susie Cupcake informed me that service dog organization typical wait list was 2 years).

Good Dog! Autism Organization has several dogs in the training program. They hand select each dog, once the dog is selected they start training at 8 weeks of age. The first year (and plus) of the dog's life, he/she is being trained on basic, advanced skills and public access skills. Once a dog is matched with a family, the dog's training is customized based on the child's and family's needs.

At the end of March 2016, we received an email saying we were part of the match process. If we match, we will start working with our dog's trainer on getting the dog trained based on Wyatt's needs. I will travel to California in July, to go through 5 days of "boot camp" training with the dog and trainer. After graduation, I will fly home with Wyatt's forever friend.

 If you would like to learn more about the extensive match process, please read the following:

http://gooddogautismcompanions.org/dog-blogs/2015/8/31/good-dog-matching-how-we-find-your-forever-pup.html .

We now wait, we wait to see if one of these dogs is Wyatt's. I can't tell you how excited I am. It's like waiting the arrival of a new child. I look at the dogs who are ready to be matched, trying to guess which one might be ours. I talk to my husband about different names for the dog (we get to rename the dog). I think about what things we need to buy. I think about organizing the travel for boot camp. I think about the boot camp training. Then I remind myself that we are not guaranteed to match this round. That if we don't match this time, it's okay. One day we will have a service dog, it will be the perfect dog for Wyatt. Trust the system. Be patient!!