Happy Birthday, Wyatt!!

January 25, 2010 after many hours of labor, Wyatt Joseph entered the world. A beautiful 9lbs 4oz baby boy that made me a mom and made us a family of three. I was over the moon with happiness and couldn't believe that this baby was mine!! I also really wanted to hold him, damn c-section! 

Wyatt was such an awesome baby. He was very happy, easy going little guy. As a toddler, he was the kid I could leave in the room and he never got into anything. His big blue eyes started melting hearts very early on!

At almost two years old, the Wyatt I knew starting to change. He stopped answering to his name, stopped talking, and stopped interacting with others. He started doing repetitive things (stimming), started having seizures, and started to become a different little boy. The world was crashing around me. I wanted/needed answers and most importantly I wanted to get him the therapy he needed (which at the time I had no earthly idea what that even was). There were many hours of crying and thinking there was no way I was the right mom for him, crying because damn it it wasn't fair.

Today, Wyatt is 7 years old. The parenting a child with special needs got a whole lot less scary and I actually think I am doing a decent job. In honor of Wyatt's birthday, here are some of my favorite things about him:

•  He doesn't care about materialistic things, he is just as happy playing with a stick as he is with a brand new toy. .
• He loves to play in the rain, mouth wide open trying to catch all the raindrops with pure bliss on his face!
• I often say I wish I had Wyatt's "I don't give a shit" attitude. He doesn't want something, he throws it to the ground and walks away. He doesn't want to talk to the person speaking to him, he just keeps walking. If he wants to be silly, he is silly. If he wants the chip my friend is eating, he will take it right from their hand. He doesn't want to wear his shirt or pants, guess what...
• He is incredibly sweet, loving, gentle, and kind. He has never purposefully hurt another person. 
• He never fights with his brother...I mean never! 
• He has helped young adults, who have been around him, decide that they want a career working with kiddos who have special needs.
• His love for Blaze. Their bond is getting stronger and stronger. 
• He has a way of making people feel super special, he is so genuine with his feelings.
• He is happy like 98.9% of the time. Always laughing and smiling. 
• When he doesn't want something (like getting his teeth cleaned, brushing his teeth, blood work, or his routine EEGs), he fights like hell and NEVER gives up. 
• He has never lied about anything. Or spoken mean about anyone or thing. 
• He works and tries so hard, every day, at things we take for granted. 
• He is so very strong!
• His appreciation of music, he can make music out of almost everything.
• He has more energy than anyone I have seen. 
• I love how he watches tv...like 2 inches from the screen, jumping up and down, and flapping his hands in delight.
• For a kid who is nonverbal, he says so much without words.
• He has amazing people instincts. He knows when someone is comfortable/uncomfortable with him and he plays them appropriately.
• He is incredibly unique and owns it. Never changes for anyone. 

I believe that all of us who are parents can say that we have learned something from our children. With Wyatt I joined this whole other world and starting became a person I never was before. How being Wyatt's mom has changed me:

• I have learned so much about things I knew very little about...Autism, Sensory Processing Disorder, Seizures, PICA, Service Dogs. 
• I have made so many new friends; therapist, special education teachers, doctors, and other special needs parents.
• Before Wyatt's dx, I never knew what it meant to fight for something I believed in. 
• I have tried so many new things...being a dog handler, raising money for Blaze, writing a blog, etc.
• I love watching other people love my son! I love when his therapist and teacher get so excited to tell me about something awesome he did that day! I love when my friends fight over who gets the most kisses from him.
• I had to learn that people judge and making inappropriate comments. That I can't fight every single battle. I can educate and advocate.
• I have learned what a difference service dogs can make in a persons life. 
• I have learned how to represent my son's needs in an IEP.
• I have learned what it feels like to feel my heartbeat outside of my body (okay, I stole this line from someone else...but its so true).
• Hope, I have learned to have so much hope. 

Happy 7th Birthday, Wyatt! You make me very proud and I am forever grateful that you are mine. If you know Wyatt and would like to share your favorite thing/things about him I would love it!

Now it's time to go celebrate a 7th birthday. I think seven will be a huge year for him!
Till next time...

Brothers

I was four months pregnant when Wyatt was diagnosed with Autism. I remember crying to Wyatt's behavioral psychologist asking her how would I be able to provide for another child when I felt like 100% of my attention needed to go to Wyatt. She promised me that a sibling would be the best thing for Wyatt.

I have to say, she was so right! River is the kindest, sweetest, loving, silliest boy. He has so much pride in helping his brother. He is always happy to help educate others that Blaze is a working dog and recently told his uncle that Wyatt had autism (which clearly he already knew). He is only 4 years old!

River attended daycare at a young age, when he was in the one-year old class his preschool teacher told me that River was the kindest friend to his friends. He was always willing to stop playing to help a friend in need and that he understood a little boy in his class who was currently going through the autism diagnosis. I was so surprised to see at such a young age his home life experience was carrying over to school.

As River got older, he started asking more questions...why doesn't Wyatt talk, why doesn't Wyatt play with me, etc. As soon as I mentioned this to my sister, she ordered him a book called My Brother Charlie. I read it to him a few times, not mentioning Wyatt but wondering if he would put the pieces together. After probably the fifth time of reading it, he said "mommy, Wyatt has autism".

So it has to be no surprise that when Blaze came home River was so excited to be part of this journey! At first, I will admit it was a bit annoying. Every time I went to give Blaze a command, River repeated it (poor Blaze). Blaze truly syncs with his environment. So a four year old bouncing around with excitement equals a dog bouncing around with excitement. It took some adjusting and setting limitations. River now knows all the commands and tries to give them to Blaze...which surprisingly Blaze will listen sometimes. A rule I had to learn about giving commands, was to say command, if Blaze didn't follow through with command, count six mississippis, and then say it again. Often you will hear River say "Blaze, sit...1,2,3,4,5,6...sit". I think my favorite thing to hear is "good boy, Blaze" coming from River's mouth.

Recently River has been talking about when he moves out and gets his own house (yes, at 4 years of age...clearly I'm not a lot of fun to live with). He told me, "don't worry mommy, we will still come visit you". I said, "you will?". He said, "Yes, Wyatt and Blaze will live with me so we will all come to visit you". We have never discussed whether or not Wyatt would be able to live on his own or maybe he just thinks brothers live together. Whatever reason, it melted my heart.

My relationship with my siblings is one of the most important relationships in my life. We experienced the best parts of life with each other and some of the very hardest parts. We grew up playing school (or maybe it was me playing student, no surprise my sister is a professor), playing barbies (brothers included), and playing softball and kickball at our grandpa's horse farm (and trivial pursuit, most boring game ever) . We've hit, pinched, and kicked each other (don't worry at much younger ages), bounced softballs off our baby brothers head (sorry, Nate), and had ugly words, including that we hated each other. We also stood by each other as the other got married (or getting married), held each others children, and comforted each other during troubled times. I know no matter what, my siblings are always there.

Although I know my boys relationship will be a bit different, I am so thankful they have each other. I hope that River always wants to educate others about his brother, wants to help others who have disabilities, and an advocate for service dogs.  I also hope that River watches how Wyatt appreciates the little things in life, like playing in the rain, how he appreciates the sound of music, and how he never expects a new toy, but happy with the things he has. I hope that Wyatt watches River to hear him talk in full sentences, play with toys appropriately, and have friendship with others. I hope that they always feel peace with one another and know no matter what they have each other.